These feet weren't made for walking...

The Gids has a rather nasty cold virus and with him being a generous sort gave it to me.  So what do you do when you're feeling a bit fluey and icksome?  The general idea is to take it easy, and with things to do of a day I decided to leave the Brompton at home and get the bus about, with little stints of walking in between.  I mean OK, it could be the cold talking but yeh, I forgot to take public transport and walked everywhere.  All 17,000 steps of it.  My legs are sore, my feet are sore, I may have shin splints, it took a lot longer than anticipated and there was no sitting down involved.  Which I think is the thing I missed the most. 

*Sniffs and coughs pathetically*

Jx

Sportive Training 101 - Lesson 2 What to do when it's P!ssing outside.

***There are a lot of photos and vids so apologies if it takes ages to load***


The weather currently looks like this where I am:

It's looked like that for days.  Storm Frank has decided he identifies as female and is now Storm Gertrude or whatever the feck her name is.  And since you, probably like me had big intentions of getting (or improving) your base level of fitness but have found yourself sitting in the softest parts of your arse eating mince pies for most of the holiday season, you now vague sense of panic that you should have started weeks ago and if you don't start now you never will (both these things are true).

So what's a cyclist to do when you can wave at Noah floating past in his ark from your living room window?  I'm not one for urging someone to spend unnecessarily, but in times like these (especially if you don't have a gym membership) I would urge you to get a Turbo Trainer.  If you've got kids, work unsociable hours or plain just don't feel like getting completely lycra'd up it's the best investment for you and your cycling.

A quick search here shows a price range (for new) of £60 upwards, but keep in mind you don't need one whose resistance you can change with a dial to get great use out of it. A thorough look (ebay or gumtree) and ask about, you may even find someone willing to lend or give you their old one for much cheaper, though I'd have a gnawing urge on the back of my head of wanting to do something NOW! and order one from the webernet with next day delivery.  If like me you're finding January a squeeze, consider this from the GCN lot:

I much prefer having my bike attached to the equipment (the main difference between a turbo trainer and roller) as a touch of the breaks or a lack of balance would send me shooting through the air but then that is just me.  

So what's the best place to set up your turbo trainer?  What kind of training and how long and often should you be on it?  What other items do you need?

1.  Where you going to put it?

• You'll need somewhere you can look at something, a window, tv or a place to set your computer screen.  It's really good for the sanity when you're on the the thing.

• Air circulation - fresh air is best as you will sweat a lot so preferably near an open window or utilise a fan if you've got one.  

• A place where it can sit.  You need to be able to slot your bike in and just go otherwise dragging it out will be more trouble than you'll be bothered about.  If you've got a place where your bike can sit there all weekdays even better.  Most Turbo Trainers have quick release mechanisms which make getting your bike on and off a doddle.  If not double check that any other system means you don't have to do much (or preferably anything) to the bike in order to make it roadworthy.

Here's where I've put mine*:

In our spare bedroom.  I admit it's not ideal but there's enough space for me to see out the window (even when it's dark), rest my computer on the sill if I need to and get on the thing. I'd have it smack bang in the middle but we're trying to keep the bed there ready for guests.

2.  What else do you need?

• ***EDIT*** It has been pointed out to me that I've neglected to mention a heart rate monitor. You can get one as cheap (Karrimoor are a good solid budget brand) or as expensive (Garmin, Fitbit, Jawbone) as you can comfortably afford.  It will help establish your highest heart rate, your resting heart rate and all sorts of other things in between (VO2 max, rate optimum for fat burning, race rate etc).  Appologies for this late addition. 

• Towels, towels and more towels.  From the picture above you can see I've pinned a rather large hand towel to act as a sweat guard (you can buy these but I'm quite tight-fisted).  In addition to this you may want to put a towel, old blanket or yoga/stretch mat under the turbo trainer itself.  Save you sweating onto your floor and from any sort of wear from sitting your 11 stone self**  on it. You will also need one to mop your brow.  

• Something to prop up the front of the bike (you don't need this if you've got rollers).  Most turbo trainers have a matching front wheel block (that you need to buy separately boo hiss), but for years I've used gaffa taped catalogues, and right now my front wheel is on a plastic drill box - it has grooves in it that hold the front bike wheel more securely - like so:

• A wee bag to hang on it.  If the weathers bad or you want to set the bike up for a few days you'll keep any accoutrement's that you require in there - it's also a really good habit to just have your cycling stuff in a little tote and to put it there after outside rides, saves a lot of time looking for things.  So things like heart rate strap, the bike shoes you have or like to wear, a wee note book and pen to record what you've done, perhaps a plastic bottle so that you've always got one handy to fill when the mood takes you.  I keep socks and a set of leggings especially for here.  When I've done a session I hand wash these items and then drape them over the radiator (and occasionally the bike itself) to dry so next day I'm on this thing those items are another thing I don't need to go look for.

3.  How should you use it?

•  In the beginning short and sweet.  5 minutes just to get the feel of it and trust yourself you're not going to topple over and then build up over time.  Your bits will get sore - even if you're used to your saddle - because the bike does not change position and the terrain stays the same so the same bits of you get a far more concentrated squeeze.  

• I doubt I know anyone who does more than 45 minutes on the turbo trainer - so keep that in mind when allocating time to it, choosing what to watch or what to do whilst on it.  Also when you are training on it you'll get a more intense work out - there's no slowing down for traffic or corners, no having to watch the verge or have cars overtake so you can really focus in on what you're doing and can get far more 'done' than the same time spent on the road. 

4.  What kind of training should you do?

• Ultimately it's up to you, but most users (myself included) do HIIT training.  There's also quite a few free You Tube training sessions specifically for turbo training.  Again the GCN guys and girls are a great free resource, not just for Turbo training sessions but their info about cycling (not just training, but pro news, news news etc) is pretty good as well. 

• In saying that don't be constrained to using it to smash out a session after session, particularly if your time is short.  In my first year I found it most useful being able to jump on and off it during the week when I wasn't/couldn't go out for 3 hours of an evening cycling.  Waiting for my bath to fill - gave me 10 minutes, up sharply in the morning 5 minutes before my shower,  15 minutes before getting ready for a night out.  Having a quiet night in with pizza - 10 minutes while it cooked. Little stints  - you don't always have to go hard - will make a big difference especially when  you can't use your bike to get to the shops or commute to work.  10 minutes during the week day keeps your limbs warm for your longer ride on Saturday or Sunday.  10 minutes the day after your long ride will help recovery and flush the lactic acid out of your legs.  5 - 10 minutes a day is enough to shut the shouty little man at the back of your head up because that will give you 50 minutes during the week that you wouldn't otherwise have done.  I've sat on the thing whilst binge watching SPACED (20 minutes long without the ad breaks) - Jobs a good un'.

If you've gotten by without a turbo trainer in your life, comment below on what you'd recommend as good substitute exercise for cycling when it's raining.  For the first in this series click here.

Jx

*My turbo trainer is an Elite Cronos Magnetic trainer with a little dial that makes it tougher in stages.  Before this I had a the same make but with a fluid base and no dail.  Would recommend the brand if you can get it.  I have no complaints.  

**Same race weight as Chris Froome - he's not 5 foot 0 though. 

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Sportive Training 101 - Lesson 1 - Just WHY?

Having within a matter of weeks entered into both Etape Caledonia 2016 and just the other day Etape Loch Ness 2016 I am putting myself forward to discuss the ins and outs of sportive training as I understand it.  Having done this for ooooh since 2011 (REALLY?!?!?!? Christ!) I flatter myself in thinking I know a thing or two about cycling, training and a few other aspects of saddle wanking the New Kids on the Block may have missed or anyone else for that matter.  And often I have found myself getting it wrong -  but consider that I have got it wrong so's youse don't have too.

I don't pretend to understand the psychology of deciding to undertake an extreme physical challenge. It is an extreme physical challenge - don't kid yourself it's anything less.  Sixty odd miles on the bike might be on the lower end of the Sportive/Public participant cycle event, but you can't do it comfortably straight off the bat.  Most regular cyclists - those 5/10 mile a day commuters - would struggle to get to the end of it without sustaining some sort of bum damage at the very least, so to go from a swing round the park with the kids a couple of times in the summer to a training sportive participant is a big thing. It's the cycling equivalent of running a marathon.  But I often find that the decision to do so involves hiding your ego behind a virtuous aim.  For example there are easier, cheaper and far less extreme ways to increase your mental or physical health, more civilised ways of getting to know your peers, and easier less time consuming ways of raising money for charity.  But I do know none of these are accompanied by a vague sense of eternal glory standing at the finish line, holding your medal aloft, back lit and in soft focus, with your fellow participants weeping softly into their merino base layers* because they just can't manage your supreme level of cycling majesty.

...we all wish tho' don't we... admit it.

Be aware though, the decision to partake in your first sportive might not be the same answer to the question 'Why?'  In the first year you will ask yourself 'Why?' Allot. In many forms. 'Why am I going out for three hours training after a full days work?' Or the 'Why am I up this early on a Sunday?' and of course my particular favourites, 'Why does it feel like I have horns growing out of the underside of my groin.',  the befuddled  'Why won't this hill end?' and the angry 'WHY DOES THIS WIND HATE ME'.

Your seat will feel like this..

Sometimes the answer to these questions will be that vision of you standing at the end on the podium holding your medal aloft, other times sudocreme (but more likely lack there of).  But be aware there are times when that vision will allude you, when it won't seem worth it and you're just too damn tired  or gritty to feel the health benefits, so sod the knickerless donkeys, kids without wigs, teapotless old folk and eternal glory.  Just Why?  I'm not going to tell you why.  What I am going to do is ask you to keep going.  I'm going to say that if you can complain about it you can still push your foot down.  You can still pedal. Hell, if you need to - and since this is your first year - get off that bike and walk**. Because at the end of your first sportive when you cross that finish line, when you feel like you've welded yourself to that bike, where your hands are cramped and your feet are ice, and the rest of you is just plain cold and crusty, a fresh faced army cadet will tentatively approach with a medal in their hands and you will snatch that medal and you will feel like that vision on the podium, back lit, in soft focus, only  perhaps weeping softly to yourself over your own cycling majesty.

Behold! My Own Cycling Majesty!!!

Jx

* Ahh merino - you will come to understand

** Only in your first year mind.

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