Not going outside...

...there be things like fresh air and sunshine.

No.  Not today as I've woken up in a black fug, which isn't helped by the 18 degree outside temperature and broad sunshine.  My misery wants some company but the summer burned off the haar from this morning and there are people smiling.

I'm not sure but I think my mood might be slightly affected by my decision to change my diet.  If there's anything that will put me in a black fug it is the word 'diet'.  Food restriction of any kind tends to make me a bit twitchy eyed.  Mostly because we could be doing so many things more with our time rather than thinking 'I really shouldn't have had that cake' or agonizing over calories*. The hypocrisy of this is that as someone who has a lot of food allergies there are a lot of things I shouldn't eat, and indeed, I'm probably one of the few people who really should be thinking 'I really shouldn't...' and since I haven't been thinking that I'm feeling the bloat.  The big massive watery bloat.  So I've been cooking beans all day.  Black beans, pinto beans, black eyed peas** beans and chick... er.. beans. It's in the hope that instead of having a cheese toastie of a luncheon I shall be able to quickly either nuke or boil off some beans in some soup or for some salad and munch on that, and then eat the cake I usually have.

'I got a feelin'... Woo Hoo... that I'm gonna eat some chickpeas... '

I have also been doing the 5:2 'lifestyle'*** with a friend of mine.  I'd put on a stone of weight about two years ago - sounds strange but I could feel it in my knees - but once back on my usual exercise regime it didn't come off.  Being a wee bit older now I have to look at other options. It's 2 days of a two egg omelet and soup split up on a Monday and a Wednesday. Most folks think that sounds awful but then I've come to the conclusion that most folks can't cook.  Most days it's a doddle but if I've scheduled a omelet and diet coke day and I'm not really feeling it I don't. My weight went down about 4kg and I've gone down a notch on my belt, but it's kind of stalled now but as I say I need to get back into the habit of eating stuff I'm not so wholly intolerant to.

Today is a 'fast day' but I'm not hungry.  I've had a sh!t load of coffee.I normally have about 3 cups regardless, but I still feel like I haven't woken up properly so I had my lunch early.  I had edemame miso soup with pak choi and I'm not feeling hungry just in need of a nap.   The dog is lying on the couch softly snoring and it's very tempting to join her. Though it is getting close to her time for  a walk.  It would probably do us both good.

Jx




* I could go into the psycology of false humility there is in 'weightloss'  but I'm not going to. I can't be arsed.

** no Fergies or Will.I.Ams have been hurt during the making of these munchies.

*** Not using the word diet, no.

Out of 52 Mondays of this year...This one has a colour

I started to write this post like this:

It's nearly the end of January and I'm thinking of how we've all done.  I have managed three weeks out of a six week programme and today I'm finding it a struggle today.  It's more than likely due to a Hen weekend with a cracking group of girls and all that prosecco, fried eggs, and hoola hooping has gone to my head.  Pinterest, particularly of the Health and Fitness threads with all those Fitsperation (a mash up of Fitness and inspiration, eugh), are getting on my nerves.  

Then I find out today is Blue Monday.  The thing is, I like blue (only as a colour, not as a band).  The sky is blue today. The colour of the coverlet I have on the bench at my window is blue, my living room is blue, my Brompton whilst officially Turkish Green, really wants to be blue and does a damn fine job of it.

What cake would be if it could be today.

It's wrong to call today blue, Shitty Mustardy Nappy Monday would be better.  Or even Black Monday would do but I think Baby Cheesus might have already seconded that one.  

I don't know why I'm taking today soo bad either.  I haven't made any resolutions, so I've really got none to drop.  The programme thing I'm doing no one would know if I said I did it or not.  It also doesn't really matter to any one else, the gids doesn't care what I do with my time as long as it doesn't make me miserable.  Not doing the exercises today wouldn't make me miserable, it'd just compound the mood I'm in.

Way more arsed than I am

I'd be annoyed less if everyone else in the world (well, all those with a lot of first world problems) wasn't having such a hard time of it.  Not because I want everyone else to be happier but because with us all in it together, it means I can't even be original.  Perhaps I should just embrace my basicness, get myself a pumpkin latte and some uggs whilst complaining that my I-Phone's all bendy.  Oh god. Perhaps this is the beginning of the wall of careful alternativeness I've been cultivating all these years crumbling down.  I'll have to quit the cycling, join Jazzercise classes, watch Eastenders, and before I know it I'll be decking a woman in tescos over a cheap giant tv that'll show the ravaged contours of Phil Mitchells face just so (Is he even in 'enders any more?)  I'll have to stop fancying Keanu Reeves and David Grohl and fantasize over Brad Pitt (meh) and Ryan Gosling (he's not really very interesting to look at, is he? Be honest.) I'll have to grow my hair, get fake tan, and all my clothes will have to be from Superydry and I'll have to  pretend I don't know the Japanese style writing is gibberish (we actually asked a japanese person).  I'll have to trade in the bike for a Quigo, and read the Daily Mail and not vote.

Oh well.  It might not be all bad.  I suppose there'll be a comfort in knowing why everyone's talking about Danny Dyer, and what a pumpkin spiced latte actually tastes like.  Perhaps, even Mr Gosling's interesting to talk to, you know, perhaps there are finer points of his personality I've missed.  I doubt it, but gotta give the guy a chance.  

Jx

Don't forget you can join me on bloglovin', Twitter, and Pinterest, if you so wish.